Volume 113 Issue 11
Science
Moving Stairs and Other Investigations
Answering questions about Stuyvesant’s escalators and the building’s construction.
Humor
Stuyvesant Students Can’t Handle AP Rizz
Stuy starts offering AP Rizz for the spring semester after seeing the student body's need for improvement in that department following the Valentine’s Day season, but not a single student is thriving.
Sports
UCL Round of 16 Power Rankings
By Soham Mukherjee, Duncan Park
Read the power rankings for the teams in the UEFA Champions League Round of 16!
Sports
Is the Stanley Cup Coming to New York?
By Kai Russell
The East may be tough to escape, but could the New York area see a Stanley Cup championship coming to them in a few months time?
Sports
From Riches to Rags
By Tomas Levani
Panic signings, internal drama, and poor decision-making—what’s the real reason behind Chelsea’s disappointing performance this season?
Sports
A Super Bowl Spectacular
By Khush Wadhwa
Though our favorites vary, some groundbreaking Super Bowl halftime shows have set the stage for the spectacular show of today.
Sports
Nothin’ But Net
By Frederik Schutz, Yashna Patel
Meet Sam Furman, senior and co-captain of the Stuyvesant girls’ varsity basketball team, who straight-up balls.
Sports
A New Era of Superteams
The 2022-2023 trade deadline has allowed teams such as the Los Angeles Lakers, Dallas Mavericks, Los Angeles Clippers, and Phoenix Suns to acquire elite players to create a Western Conference full of superteams.
Humor
Why Redheads Are the Best
By Astrid Harrington, Sara Heller
In honor of Saint Patrick’s Day, we have compiled a list of explanations for the general amazing news of red hair.
Humor
The ChatGPT Epidemic: Responses
In the midst of the ChatGPT era, join me as I explore some methods teachers have implemented to try to combat its takeover.
Humor
The Backstory Behind the Best Subway Tuna Fish Footlong Recipe of All Time
By Fiona 'Eve' Lin, Munem Tajwar
This is the only recipe you will ever need.
Humor
SING! More like SACRILEGIOUS!
A Stuyvesant parent writes an outraged e-mail to Principal Yu over Junior SING! Bible Camp.
Humor
Sheiny New Toys
By Mikayla Lin
Some ideas for holidays to celebrate for Make Up Your Own Holiday Day on March 26.

Opinions
Eating Shouldn’t Be Expensive
Being celiac is significantly more expensive than it should be.

Science
Printing Life: 3D Custom Hearts
By Erica Wong
Revolutionary aortic stenosis treatments use printed 3D custom hearts.

Science
Mosquitoes: The Extinction Dilemma
By Gary Jiang
With new gene editing advancements like artificial gene drives, the dangerous mosquito can now be completely eradicated—but should it be?

Sports
How the Peglegs Completed the Repeat
By Ahmed Radwan
Stuyvesant’s girls’ varsity table tennis team, the Peglegs, were crowned PSAL champions for the second consecutive year, once again undefeated in the regular season.

News
Drumming into Black History Month with its Annual Dinner
By Lenny Metlitsky, Ivy Huang, Kevin Chan
Stuyvesant hosted the annual Black History Month dinner on February 9.

News
Stuyvesant Science Olympiad Team Wins Regionals Competition
By Sadat Ahmed, Madeline Goodwin
Stuyvesant’s Science Olympiad team places first in February 4’s regional competition.

Humor
The Ultimate SAT Survival Guide: Proven Techniques for Last-Minute Prep
Get ready to conquer the SAT in record time with The Ultimate SAT Survival Guide, packed with proven techniques and expert tips for last-minute prep that will help you score higher and stress less on test day.

News
Senior Kathleen Zhang Named Scholar For Regeneron Science Talent Search
By Judy Namkoong, Andrew Liu, Uma Sukhu, Ziying Jian, Aarya Balakrishnan
Kathleen Zhang, a current senior, was named as one of 300 scholars for her project in the Regeneron Science Talent Search.

Features
Stopping Hunger at Its Roots: The Food Security Club
By Julia Chernobelsky, Elaine Huan
Look into a club that helps out people in need while also reducing food waste from the Stuyvesant cafeteria.
Arts and Entertainment
Teachers’ Favorite Albums
By The Arts & Entertainment Department
Teachers’ Favorite Albums
News
Should Stuyvesant Continue to Distribute COVID-19 Test Kits?
Students and teachers reflect on the necessity of COVID-19 test distribution.
News
Stuyvesant Sophomores Receive a Presentation on Early College Awareness
By Judy Namkoong, Christina Wang
Stuyvesant sophomores received an early college awareness presentation from the college counseling department.
Arts and Entertainment
Chronically Online As The World Burns: This Is Why Review
By Benson Chen
Paramore has changed their sound once again on This is Why, still retaining their signature socially-conscious lyrics.
News
Black at Stuyvesant Development Day Talk
By Sarah Diaz, Seth Fenton, Talia Arcasoy
Stuyvesant hosted a professional development talk on February 8 regarding the topic of culturally-sensitive education.
Arts and Entertainment
Gracie Abrams Says Good Riddance to the Blame Game
Abrams stands at the forefront of bedroom pop fame with lyrical and vocal mastery, dragged down from the precipice by unremarkable production.
News
Personal Finance: A Semester Later
By Sharon Zhou, Juni Park, Kevin Chan, Allison Zhao, Andy Lau, Elaine Wong
The Personal Finance elective has been annualized with many students continuing to provide positive feedback about the class.
Opinions
The Rizzlers and The Rizzled
The relatively new term “rizz” has been inspiring many jokes within Stuyvesant’s hallways, but some of them may be reinforcing gender stereotypes that have been around forever.
Arts and Entertainment
Cocaine Bear: It’s Exactly What It Sounds Like
A review of Cocaine Bear, based on the true story.
Opinions
What’s in a DNA Test?
With the growing popularity of ancestry tests, it is important to keep in mind that the results don’t completely define your ethnic identity and that there are deeper factors in play.
Arts and Entertainment
When Wanting Isn’t Enough
By Benson Chen
Desire, I Want To Turn Into You is Caroline Polachek’s triumphant and daring return.
Arts and Entertainment
The Clean Girl Aesthetic: Rebranding Minority Cultures
By Raaita Anwar
Since early 2022, the clean girl aesthetic has dominated TikTok, making its way into fashion magazines and makeup marketing campaigns advertising exclusionary beauty standards.
Arts and Entertainment
Scooby Who?
A character-focused review of HBO Max’s controversial new animated series, Velma.

Science
Unleashing the Creative Potential of AI: The Artistic Revolution
By Vinson Chen
AI art has been developing for decades, and with the advent of machine learning, has become capable of creating art completely independently, rivaling even the most skilled human artists.
Science
Moving Stairs and Other Investigations
Answering questions about Stuyvesant’s escalators and the building’s construction.
Humor
Stuyvesant Students Can’t Handle AP Rizz
Stuy starts offering AP Rizz for the spring semester after seeing the student body's need for improvement in that department following the Valentine’s Day season, but not a single student is thriving.

Opinions
Eating Shouldn’t Be Expensive
Being celiac is significantly more expensive than it should be.

Science
Printing Life: 3D Custom Hearts
By Erica Wong
Revolutionary aortic stenosis treatments use printed 3D custom hearts.

Science
Mosquitoes: The Extinction Dilemma
By Gary Jiang
With new gene editing advancements like artificial gene drives, the dangerous mosquito can now be completely eradicated—but should it be?

Sports
How the Peglegs Completed the Repeat
By Ahmed Radwan
Stuyvesant’s girls’ varsity table tennis team, the Peglegs, were crowned PSAL champions for the second consecutive year, once again undefeated in the regular season.
Sports
UCL Round of 16 Power Rankings
By Soham Mukherjee, Duncan Park
Read the power rankings for the teams in the UEFA Champions League Round of 16!
Sports
Is the Stanley Cup Coming to New York?
By Kai Russell
The East may be tough to escape, but could the New York area see a Stanley Cup championship coming to them in a few months time?
Sports
From Riches to Rags
By Tomas Levani
Panic signings, internal drama, and poor decision-making—what’s the real reason behind Chelsea’s disappointing performance this season?
Sports
A Super Bowl Spectacular
By Khush Wadhwa
Though our favorites vary, some groundbreaking Super Bowl halftime shows have set the stage for the spectacular show of today.
Sports
Nothin’ But Net
By Frederik Schutz, Yashna Patel
Meet Sam Furman, senior and co-captain of the Stuyvesant girls’ varsity basketball team, who straight-up balls.
Sports
A New Era of Superteams
The 2022-2023 trade deadline has allowed teams such as the Los Angeles Lakers, Dallas Mavericks, Los Angeles Clippers, and Phoenix Suns to acquire elite players to create a Western Conference full of superteams.
Humor
Why Redheads Are the Best
By Astrid Harrington, Sara Heller
In honor of Saint Patrick’s Day, we have compiled a list of explanations for the general amazing news of red hair.
Humor
The ChatGPT Epidemic: Responses
In the midst of the ChatGPT era, join me as I explore some methods teachers have implemented to try to combat its takeover.

News
Drumming into Black History Month with its Annual Dinner
By Lenny Metlitsky, Ivy Huang, Kevin Chan
Stuyvesant hosted the annual Black History Month dinner on February 9.

News
Stuyvesant Science Olympiad Team Wins Regionals Competition
By Sadat Ahmed, Madeline Goodwin
Stuyvesant’s Science Olympiad team places first in February 4’s regional competition.
Humor
The Backstory Behind the Best Subway Tuna Fish Footlong Recipe of All Time
By Fiona 'Eve' Lin, Munem Tajwar
This is the only recipe you will ever need.
Humor
SING! More like SACRILEGIOUS!
A Stuyvesant parent writes an outraged e-mail to Principal Yu over Junior SING! Bible Camp.

Humor
The Ultimate SAT Survival Guide: Proven Techniques for Last-Minute Prep
Get ready to conquer the SAT in record time with The Ultimate SAT Survival Guide, packed with proven techniques and expert tips for last-minute prep that will help you score higher and stress less on test day.

News
Senior Kathleen Zhang Named Scholar For Regeneron Science Talent Search
By Judy Namkoong, Andrew Liu, Uma Sukhu, Ziying Jian, Aarya Balakrishnan
Kathleen Zhang, a current senior, was named as one of 300 scholars for her project in the Regeneron Science Talent Search.
Humor
Sheiny New Toys
By Mikayla Lin
Some ideas for holidays to celebrate for Make Up Your Own Holiday Day on March 26.

Features
Stopping Hunger at Its Roots: The Food Security Club
By Julia Chernobelsky, Elaine Huan
Look into a club that helps out people in need while also reducing food waste from the Stuyvesant cafeteria.
Features
Trading Full Schedules for Empty Stomachs
By Rhea Malhotra, Hifza Kaleem, Ankita Saha
A look at students’ eating habits as they balance their personal lives with heavy workloads and immense stress.

Opinions
Modern Music: Nonsensical Lyrics and Meaningless Messages
Modern music has become more and more meaningless and vulgar compared to older songs with clearer morals and messages.

Features
Stuyvesant’s Social Spaces Dilemma
By Daniella Solomon, Ada Gordon
An investigation into the English department room’s new policy of only allowing three students at a time.
Arts and Entertainment
Instagram Fashion Is Killing You
Fashion communities on Instagram and TikTok alike have increasingly become hubs of consumerism and commodity fetishism.
Arts and Entertainment
Teachers’ Favorite Albums
By The Arts & Entertainment Department
Teachers’ Favorite Albums

Arts and Entertainment
Gracie Abrams Says Good Riddance to the Blame Game
Abrams stands at the forefront of bedroom pop fame with lyrical and vocal mastery, dragged down from the precipice by unremarkable production.

News
Personal Finance: A Semester Later
By Sharon Zhou, Juni Park, Kevin Chan, Allison Zhao, Andy Lau, Elaine Wong
The Personal Finance elective has been annualized with many students continuing to provide positive feedback about the class.

Opinions
The Rizzlers and The Rizzled
The relatively new term “rizz” has been inspiring many jokes within Stuyvesant’s hallways, but some of them may be reinforcing gender stereotypes that have been around forever.

Arts and Entertainment
Cocaine Bear: It’s Exactly What It Sounds Like
A review of Cocaine Bear, based on the true story.
News
Should Stuyvesant Continue to Distribute COVID-19 Test Kits?
Students and teachers reflect on the necessity of COVID-19 test distribution.
News
Stuyvesant Sophomores Receive a Presentation on Early College Awareness
By Judy Namkoong, Christina Wang
Stuyvesant sophomores received an early college awareness presentation from the college counseling department.

Opinions
What’s in a DNA Test?
With the growing popularity of ancestry tests, it is important to keep in mind that the results don’t completely define your ethnic identity and that there are deeper factors in play.
Arts and Entertainment
Chronically Online As The World Burns: This Is Why Review
By Benson Chen
Paramore has changed their sound once again on This is Why, still retaining their signature socially-conscious lyrics.

Arts and Entertainment
When Wanting Isn’t Enough
By Benson Chen
Desire, I Want To Turn Into You is Caroline Polachek’s triumphant and daring return.

Arts and Entertainment
The Clean Girl Aesthetic: Rebranding Minority Cultures
By Raaita Anwar
Since early 2022, the clean girl aesthetic has dominated TikTok, making its way into fashion magazines and makeup marketing campaigns advertising exclusionary beauty standards.

Arts and Entertainment
Scooby Who?
A character-focused review of HBO Max’s controversial new animated series, Velma.

Humor
Smoking Hot Takes on Junior SING!
By Erica Chen, Ravindra Mangar, Oliver Hollmann
Ever wanted to sign up for Stuyvesant’s very own Bible Camp…?