When Life Gives You Spring Breaks

Dear juniors,

Are you stressed? I mean, of course you are. 

However, has your tortured soul been inexplicably tossed into the great unknown, leaving you stranded on an island of college decisions surrounded by equally stranded and anxious folks fretting over the ever-certain possibility of these 5.4 percent of their lives dictating the 75.5 percent left of their future (assuming you’ve even got 73.4 years to live after all the sleepless nights)? 

That was quite a long sentence—please take a breather. Anyways, you’ve stumbled across the right words on the rest of these dull, gray, and musty-smelling pages (or mindless text on some screen). Since spring break is coming up, to calm your growing concerns, I’ve procured a well-thought-out plan to prepare you for college if you don’t know where to start:

1. Plan a road trip to the Dominican Republic with your friends. Hit up some seniors with a driver’s license; live a little before you graduate. You might just stumble upon the perfect college essay to write about, showing college admissions officers just how much this trip abroad meant to you, forever changing your high school experience and worldview. 
2. Swim the length of the Appalachian Mountains (this is an easy way to show consistency and effort on your college apps). If you look hard enough, you’ll find a continuous stream of water, and just go with the flow until you end up in Georgia—you’ll know when you get there; watch out for the random deer in headlights blocking your path.
3. Start “The Lemonade Stand.” Show colleges that you can run an original business and try your luck at making $34.82 while you’re at it. This will help you stand out in your applications.
4. Use the money from said lemonade stand to buy ice cream and proceed to start Project StuyIceCream. Any extracurricular with the words “project” and “Stuy” in it is bound to succeed! Then, repeat step three. 
5. After you have successfully completed the two previous steps, use the funds to buy some fireworks and celebrate your success. Congratulations, you’ve proven to yourself and everyone else that you can do it; making all that money was no small feat! Huh? What comes after, I hear you ask?
6. Well, do nothing. I mean, you’ve done all you could’ve. Your four years are almost up. Let success chase after you. Don’t be the one to chase it. Be nonchalant about it.

Well, I hope this advice was helpful, and be sure to share it with your peers! They’re not your real competitors, so where’s the harm? After all, they’re all you’ve got for these four years and potentially the next few years after (or decade, wow, you must be best buds going into the same field)! And just a reminder—we’re all going to end at the finish line, so might as well slow down every once in a while.

What will you be doing over this spring break?

Looking forward to it, 

Your College Counselor