The Humor Group Chat—Out of Context Edition

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Issue 13, Volume 110

By Veronika Kowalski 

Cover Image

You’ve read the tabloids. You know the stars. But do you know what happens behind the scenes? Let’s take a look. Here are some of our favorite zingers taken out of context:

“I like how all my ideas since fat Yoshi were lowkey meant to piss off the editorial board.” —Victor Kuang, senior

“My handwriting literally has not progressed since the third grade.” —Kuang

“Fat Yoshi is like that.” —Chrisabella Javier, junior

“Nice, supple feet with toes tastefully obscured by the shadows, leaving one longing for a taste of what may very well be paradise.” —Asa Muhammad, sophomore

“My kink is girls who don’t like me, not feet.” —Muhammad

Author’s note: That’s what they always say…

“WOODIRLELWSLAA.” —Caroline Pickering, sophomore

“Nice feet.” —Logan Ruzzier, sophomore

Author’s note: This a pickup line that’s bound to work every time, folks.

“That’s not even Korean, you imbecile. I mean, Japanese. It’s not that either.” —Aaron Wang, sophomore

Author’s note: Yeah, and it’s not delivery, it’s DiGiorno.

“MY TRAP CARD.” —Helena Williams, junior

“The Tim and Moby fanfic was too scary.” —Wang

“Okay, y'all gonna talk about BrainPOP fanfics?” —Williams

“I'm so edgy I don't eat candy canes.” —Williams

[[end card]]: As you can tell, the Humor department does not publish libel or slander. We only write the truth. My personal truth is that fat Yoshi do, in fact, be like that sometimes.